The week after Christmas
The Week After Christmas
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'Twas the week after Christmas, and all through the house Nothing would
fit me, not even a blouse.
The cookies I'd nibble, the eggnog I'd taste All the holiday parties had
gone to my waist.
When I got on the scales there arose such a number!
When I walked to the store (less a walk - more a lumber)
I'd remember the marvelous meals I'd prepared; The gravies and sauces
and beef nicely rared,
The rum balls, the bread and the cheese
And the way I'd never said, "No thank you, please."
As I dressed myself in my husband's old shirt And prepared once again to
do battle with dirt,
I said to myself, as I only can,
"You can't spend a winter disguised as a man!"
So, away with the last of the sour cream dip, Get rid of the fruit cake,
every cracker and chip.
Every last bit of food that I like must be banished, 'Til all the
additional ounces have vanished.
I won't have a cookie - not even a lick.
I'll want only to chew on a long celery stick.
I won't have hot biscuits, or corn bread, or pie, I'll munch on a carrot
and quietly cry.
I'm hungry, I'm lonesome, and life is a bore But isn't that what January
is for?
Unable to giggle, no longer a riot -
Happy New Year to all
and to all a good diet!
Have a wonderful 2010!
Views: 0
Comment
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Comment by Trudy/WI on January 8, 2010 at 11:08am -
Love it! Good one! You'd think I wrote this... but I didn't!
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Comment by Linda Richards/N. Ontario on January 8, 2010 at 11:07am -
Great Melzee. I think we can all relate. Thanks for sharing.
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Comment by Janet/MO on January 8, 2010 at 7:53am
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that is really funny. Gave me a good chuckle.
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Comment by Cheryl / NC on January 8, 2010 at 6:30am -
Oh Boy can I relate to THAT! LOL!
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Comment by Its Vic! on January 8, 2010 at 6:15am -
Always good to start out the day with a good giggle...(giggle)!
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Comment by Beverly/NC on January 8, 2010 at 6:05am -
That is so funny! Thanks for sharing it. I love it when you read something and laugh out loud!
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Comment by Pam/NY on January 8, 2010 at 5:01am -
Okay...we hate Sunshine for the day(lol) that is sooo cute and sooooo true!
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Comment by Sunshine/Mi on January 8, 2010 at 4:30am -
FUNNY! that was the one advantage to the kids not coming home for the holidays... I didn't do all the baking that I usually do - and I didn't gain any weight from 'testing' the goods or eating the 'leftovers'.
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Comment by Barb D in Maine on January 8, 2010 at 3:53am -
I agree with Susan and Judy, that is too too funny! Thanks for sharing!
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Comment by Judy/WA on January 7, 2010 at 10:37pm -
That is so funny! It sure fits me to a tee. It sounds like I could have written it.
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