hello everyone. well things have been happening in my life that I never intended to be happening with me. I have seen more of a hospital room than my own apartment. I hope now that I am home I can get back to doing things just a little more slower and not try to overdo myself.
I know I have messed up two swaps I am in and I do apologize. I am not one of those people who just gather blocks and don't send any out. I am just in some health issues that came up and interrupted my life. do you think I really planned on it. No, I never intended on any of this. I do feel badly and have been crying a lot. I have apologized so many times I don't know what else to do
but I am getting all these blocks out and then well no one will want me around anyway. so I don't know if I will be in any groups because I have a feeling I will be kicked out so what is the need for me to be her. :( yes it hurts for something I had no control over.
I don't have the easy access to computer as most people do. I don't have cable nor do I have internet in my home. the only way I can get online is if I can get access thru my phone as my modem but there are a lot of times I cant get online nor can I send texts or call. my cell phone company sucks but I don't have the money too go out and buy a new phone thru someone else.
while I was in the hospital my phone was off I couldn't call or get online and the doctors wouldn't let my son bring my computer there. they said I had to much attached to me and icu they didn't allow it. so how was I to let anyone know. I don't have anyones number of anyone in my groups so I couldn't call them and let them know either. so the first day when I got home I waited till the company finally turned my phone back on, I got online and let people know . yes I did that before anything else. I felt so bad and still do that I let people down. I never meant to.
I don't know what to do now except to finish the swaps that I am in. I am almost done with the blocks anyway. I did manage to get that far with them before I spent my summer in the hospital.
but how does one prove and rebuild trust with swaps. and ladies in the rooms here. I don't want to ousted. but I don't know what to do. yes it does soundlike I am begging and yes I am. I do like being In the groups and learning new things. the ladies on here are the only ones I have to take about with quilting who understand for my family understands nothing. they all think my sewing stuff is just junk.
so ladies please give me input on how to handle and deal with things from now on. I know I wont be in any swaps till I know I can complete them on time and feeling better. but how do I get the ladies to trust me again?????I
one thing I don't understand is that I was bashed before I could get online and explain where I was or what happened to me. the ladies just though I was ignoring them when I couldn't even get online heck I couldn't
even be home. how do they think I felt. how do they think I feel now. I already felt bad before I read the posts but then after I read some posts I felt even wors. omg I have cried so much I never knew my eyes coud do that and they are so red..
you ladies think I don't hurt, you think I don't feel bad . you think I am going to do nothing about it.. well I do hurt and I do feel bad and I do cry and yes you will see you will get mail.
so if anyone could give me ideas on how to get thru all this let me know. for I do still want to be in groups just maybe not do swaps for awhile but I would like to maybe sometime next year.
so let me know ladies. and thanks for listening to me. since I really don't have anyone but the ladies here in these groups to talk to.
have a great September